Around the world in 800 words — more or less
TOM BURGUM
Contributing Columnist
burgum@lbknews.com
It’s still the Clintons
It appears that Hillary Clinton will be our next Secretary of State, that is if husband Bill can pass muster on the famous Obama questionnaire. When he gets to “are there any incidents in your past that might prove embarrassing,” he can simply refer them to several books that have been written about several incidents that some think to be in the embarrassing category.
Some wonder why Hillary would leave an established position of power in the Senate for the sometimes-empty glamour of the State Department. Do you remember who served as Secretary of State for Franklin Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, John Kennedy, Lyndon Johnson, Dick Nixon, Jimmy Carter, Ronald Reagan or Bill Clinton? Hillary, given time, could become one of the lions-of-the-Senate, and it seems like a bad trade for her.
It works well for Barack Obama. He obviously believes, as did Lyndon Johnson, that, “If your are going to have to live with a camel, it is better to have it inside the tent peeing out than outside peeing in.” Obama won’t have to worry about Hillary trying to amend his health care plan if she is being shot at in Bosnia, or wherever.
The bottom line is that we will never be done with the Clintons. As Maureen Dowd famously wrote, “It is as if the Clintons are a space virus and we are the host body in which they have chosen to live.”
The government is here to help you
Americans in general, and General Motors in particular, are about to learn the wisdom of Ronald Reagan’s warning that the 10 scariest words in the English language are, “I’m from the federal government, and I’m here to help.” Check around the neighborhood to see if anyone buys that old load of cobs.
Some in Congress want to loan a large amount of the taxpayer’s money to General Motors (GM), ostensibly to bail out the ailing American auto industry. They assure us there will be no problem, because Congress will stay involved so as to insure efficient and cost effective management. (Pause here for raucous laughter.)
The plan, according to Neil Boortz, “includes adding certain strings to the auto bailout: new fuel-efficiency standards, development of new technology ‘to compete in the domestic and global market’ and restructuring finances.” Barney Frank, late of Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac fame, said lawmakers will attach several conditions for Detroit automakers in return for a financial bailout. Bill Nelson, our own revered senior senator, allowed as how Detroit would be compelled to make the more fuel efficient cars demanded by the public.
Sounds good but just check the neighborhood and see how many small, fuel-efficient cars are parked in the driveways. In America, people generally seem to believe other people should drive small, fuel-efficient, environmentally friendly cars while they continue to drive their 12-passenger, Belch-Fire SUV. Small and efficient doesn’t cut it if you need the room for the kids and the groceries.
One has to wonder just what has happened in the recent past that gives our legislators the idea they can manage anything — even their own business. It certainly can’t be the economic miracle Congress wrought with their intervention in the housing market.
Let someone else save the planet
According to the Telegraph, a London-based newspaper, “The European Union is facing a revolt from poorer members over tough climate change targets at a time when the global economy is heading for recession.” Poland, Hungary, Latvia, Lithuania, Romania, Bulgaria and Slovakia all threaten to veto plans to cut Europe’s CO2 emissions 20 percent by 2020.
Poland, with its reliance on coal-fired stations, is a bit upset. The Telegraph quoted Poland’s Prime Minister Donald Tusk’s objection: “We do not say to the French that they have to close down their nuclear power industry and build windmills, and nobody can tell us the equivalent.”
Memo to West Virginia, Kentucky, Ohio, South Dakota, North Dakota, Montana and Wyoming: When the feds come to close down the mines and erect windmills, call Donald Tusk — he can tell them to go to hell in several languages.
Actually, this is just another example of people rethinking their dedication to fighting global warming once the economic cost is tabulated.
Voters nix environmental state ballot measures
There were five major energy and environmental ballot initiatives from California to Missouri, and all but one were voted down. Even environmentally aware California voted down two measures: one would have established new rules to ramp up renewable energy, the other would have promoted natural-gas vehicles in the state. (T. Boone Pickens, call your office.) Even San Francisco voted down attempts to take over the city’s private electric company and make it greener than green.
Colorado voted for Barack Obama and environmentally friendly Senate candidate Mark Udall but struck down a ballot measure that would have increased taxes on the oil and gas industries to pay for environmental goodies such as environmental conservation and clean energy.
In short, lower taxes 4, environment 0. There is a lesson there in case anyone in Washington is watching.
Joe Biden is missing
Has anyone been in contact with or heard news of our new vice president? Has the Obama transition team sent him to the undisclosed location where Dick Cheney used to reside? I wouldn’t be surprised to find his picture on a milk carton with the message, “Anyone who has seen this man, please call 1-800-BH-Obama.”
We must find Joe as any number of people are counting on him for the comic relief in the Obama administration.
